Wise And Happy Newsletter

Cute Things I’ve Learned From My Husband – And the Art of Winning Easily

June 9, 2025

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Happy Monday, Reader!

Hahaha — even before I could begin writing this, I couldn’t help but burst out laughing just recalling the things I wanted to share.

Mark, my husband, has always been one of my mentors. But he’s not the kind who coaches you or tells you what to do. He shows you new, odd perspectives on life that make you go, “Wow. Damn. It’s that easy?!”

I used to wish that when I shared my challenges, he’d give me advice or explain things the way I often do. But after almost a decade of marriage, I’ve learned to appreciate his own way of guiding me – not with words, but with actions and presence.

Here are two things I’ve recently learned (and loved) from him:

1. The Art of Lazy Competition (And Winning Anyway)

I’ve seen this again and again with Mark. He always says, “He doesn’t care.” But oh, trust me – he’s really competitive.

The only difference between us is that I’m competitive and take it seriously, from the tiniest details to the biggest vision. Mark? He competes, acts chill… and still wins.

Let me ground this with a hilarious story.

He told me he was entering an art competition. Okayyy – so here’s the context. My husband has repeatedly told me he’s not creative. I’ve seen his drawings before and, well, as someone with a Bachelor’s in Arts… they didn’t exactly pass.

So when he mentioned the competition, I just nodded, “Good for you.” (Guilty as charged – I didn’t really pay attention.)

He graduated pre-law, by the way – so imagine the leap.

One weekend, as he was driving me to the gym, he casually mentioned that he won the art competition. It was for Nurse’s Week. He was laughing out loud as he told me how his colleagues had drawn original artwork or pieced things together manually… and he? He used an AI tool to generate his entry.

He won the award, and people were genuinely moved by the image.

I asked, “Did you tell them you used AI?”
He said, “Yes. The rule was just to create an artwork – it didn’t specify the medium. So I chose the easiest way to participate without spending too much time. I won prize by working smart. But I do feel bad that many people don’t even know about AI yet.”

I was stunned. To him, it was just another competition. He wanted to participate and support his colleagues who organised the competition and like the idea of winning – but not so much that he’d lose sleep over it.

I know my husband. He’s one of the most hardworking, smart-working, diligent people I know. He’s competitive enough to want to win – but wise enough to choose what’s worth his sweat, and what’s not. He shows you how to do hard things the easy way – and if he doesn’t win? He’ll show you how it’s totally okay… and life is just one big comedy.

That moment taught me: you can be a diligent, competitive person and still win by doing the smartest, easiest thing.

This guy.

2. Why Visualising Your Win Might Be the First Step (He Proves It)

One evening, he came home and casually told me he had started writing a book.

He didn’t say he had an idea. He didn’t say he was planning to write one.
He told me after finishing the first chapter.

Living with this guy taught me to expect the unexpected. I was surprised and proud. If you’ve been following me, you know I’ve been working on my own books too. (They’re done, by the way – I’m just facing some internal resistance to publishing.)

And then here comes my husband – quietly working on a book, telling me only after making real progress.

And as he was putting his bag down, he said,
“You know, it’s funny because I’m already practicing what I’d say in podcast interviews. I can see myself receiving awards, you know? Hahahaha.”

He said it like a joke, laughing at himself. I laughed too – but he was teaching me something important.

I thought, “Look at the man I married. Cluelessly brilliant and funny as hell.”

That’s how we should all do it, right?
Advocate for yourself.
Visualise your success before it happens.
Get motivated.
Have fun.

He told me the reason he started writing was because he remembered something I once said – something I learned from Elizabeth Gilbert:

When an idea comes, you should pray about it and decide whether to pursue it or not. If you don’t, the idea won’t die… but it’ll pass on to someone else. If you don’t want it, thank it and surrender it in prayer.

He said, “I didn’t want the idea to pass, so I wrote it.”
(I am super freaking proud.)

He also remembered another thing I told him: that the first thing you create is the fuel for many more so it’s not going to be perfect. Don’t overthink it – just start.

He said, “This is just the beginning.”

Honestly? I’m proud.
Those thoughts I shared in passing – just casual musings – he picked them up and acted on them.

I love this marriage.


Shoutouts & Gratitude 📨

To everyone who reposted my newsletter, replied to my emails, or just sent sweet messages – THANK YOUU for making this feel like a true community. I see you and I love reading your stories and reflections. Few of them below 🥹


Questions for You This Week

  • Are there areas in your life where you’re making it harder than it needs to be?
  • When was the last time you “won” by doing less, not more?

Spread the Love ✨

If this made you smile, made you think, or made you feel seen:

👉 Reply to this email and tell me what part you related to
📸 Take a screenshot and tag me on IG so I can repost you
📤 Forward this to a friend who needs this message today

Here’s to helping you win and laugh ( ≧ᗜ≦),
Dane

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I'm Dane, Your Coach & Friend

I'm a coach & entrepreneur who helps creatives & hustlers land their dream jobs whilst building their online brands. Ultimately, I love listening to people who talk about ideas, life, and space.

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